Hopefully this works. I haven't tried to embed a non-youtube video yet. Here is a link to the original post if it didn't work. Hearing this blogger say that glitter is the herpes of craft supplies on live television is kind of hilarious. (Also does the host remind anyone else of Amy Sedaris? A little bit?)
Friday, March 29, 2013
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Why I am Boycotting Nestlé (and: my breastfeeding story)
Preface: This is not a tirade against formula feeding or against formula feeding moms and dads. This is only about predatory marketing. It is just my story.
There are many good reasons to boycott Nestlé, from their predatory marketing in 3rd world countries, to their misleading "breastfeeding support" hotlines and websites, to their 30+ years of violation of the WHO code for marketing breastmilk substitutes. What finally pushed me over the edge, though, was my own experience. Selfish, I know.
Midwinter in early 2010 or late 2009, I needed to buy some maternity clothes. Since there aren't a lot of stores that carry plus sized maternity clothing, I went to one where I knew I could find a few decent, if overpriced, maternity jeans, sweaters, and t-shirts. My mom went with me to Motherhood Maternity in Southdale. She bought a couple things for me as birthday presents and I bought the rest. At the checkout counter I gave my usual "no, I don't give out my personal information" when the clerk asked if I wanted to sign up for their marketing list. But this lady was pushy. They were offering a discount on the clothes (I think? It's hard to remember back that far) and a $50 "gift card" for restaurants.com. Naiive young pregnant woman that I was, I believed that it was worth the $50 to give her my address. Anyone who's used restaurants.com knows that it's not a gift card, it's a coupon. $50 off a purchase of $100 or more, or you could instead buy $25 off a purchase of $35 or more, which is what I did to get a slightly better deal. I was annoyed, but it wasn't like I was out any extra money, yet.
(Side note: the website has a limited selection of restaurants where the coupon can be redeemed, none of which were in our neighborhood aside from the s****y "Mexican" bar across the highway. They specialize in the cuisine of "southern Colorado", and everyone who works there is white and bitchy. They had a sign that said "We Say Merry Christmas" that year, a thinly veiled "Jews and Muslims Not Welcome" sign. We lived in a neighborhood with a lot of Muslim immigrants, who were in general good neighbors, so I was annoyed. Not like they would have eaten there, since, you know, pork, but the sign was visible from the highway and the idea of making my good neighbors feel unwelcome was really upsetting to me. We didn't go back, and lost that extra $25 worth of coupon. Ugh.)
About a month before Sam was born, I received in the mail two small cans of Enfamil. I was livid. At the time I had no idea who had sent them or why. Was it thebump.com? My doctor or the hospital where I'd preregistered? The retailers where I'd registered for baby gifts? I had no idea but I was pissed. I'd always known I'd want to have kids and breastfeed those kids. It is the main reason why I put up with decades of back pain rather than get a breast reduction and risk my chances of being able to breastfeed. The idea that anyone would think I would want this stuff in my house (and I already knew that just having it available was risking my success at breastfeeding) made me angry. Not because I hate formula. Because I hate the pusher aspect of the companies who sell it. Here's a free sample, just enough to get you hooked on a highly processed food that will be your baby's sole nutrition for 6 months. No way. I'd planned to give both cans to a friend who happened to have stopped breastfeeding and was giving her daughter formula at the time, but then I went on bedrest. And didn't see her again until the hospital, and by the time I was able to actually give her the formula it was far too late.
Sam latched pretty well in the hospital. There were a couple hiccups here and there--a psycho nurse who insisted on pumping his stomach and giving him a small amount of formula through a tube, because of "low blood sugar". Yes, he was a little lethargic. He was barely a day old and it was the middle of the night. I probably should have asked to pump, or just put him straight on the boob after the mucous came out of his tummy, but I was tired. I hurt everywhere. Ladies, this is why you need labor and post-partum doulas who know your choices and can stand up for you. Your partner is not going to do it unless you've gotten him to do his own research and get enthusiastically on board (and well versed) with the plan, which didn't happen in my case.
Both of us were reasonably uneducated about breastfeeding a newborn, and honestly I think that first "he's got low blood sugar, it's not working" killed my confidence. In the next few days, rather than nursing on demand 24 hours per day, I let Dan take him for a few hours each night so I could rest. Again, everything hurt--especially my right wrist, where they finally got the IV to go in for my pitocin. The hep lock was poorly managed after Sam was born, and I'm not exactly sure what happened, but it hurt all the time for a couple of months, making it super-difficult for me to hold Sam to my breast. So. We slept in shifts. Bad, bad idea. Sam needed to be on the boob more or less at all times and I was so frustrated with the whole thing because he was always crying. I thought it wasn't working. I couldn't understand why my baby was so angry all the time. (As it turns out, crying is a very, very late hunger cue. Any time a newborn is awake, he or she should be eating.) We were writing down everything, timing everything, and he wasn't having quite enough wet diapers by day 4. I broke down. Dan's (very pregnant at the time) sister took him to the store to buy a double electric pump and her husband watched Sam while I lay down and cried for a bit.
At 5 days old, Sam weighed almost two pounds less than his birth weight. He was dehydrated. I nursed him at the doctors office and he gained an ounce. That day we were sent here, there, and everywhere, to try to get someone to help us get the breastfeeding thing working. It was exhausting and by the end of the day, I had learned some useful things about getting Sam to latch but had not gained any confidence, and was still encouraged to record *&^$ing everything. Because there would be a test. So it seemed. At that point I was more afraid of having my baby taken away from me for not feeding him "right" than anything else. Irrational post-partum-brain nonsense? Sure. Did anyone attempt to replace those assumptions with anything else? Nope. And the $300 bill for the hospital lactation consultant took for freaking ever for the insurance to pay. Obviously I didn't go back, even though I probably needed to and it was technically covered. (LLL was unreachable when we tried that morning. I was sent to a WIC peer counselor and then a LC at United/Children's.)
Sam had his first bottle of formula that night. I strongly suspect that if Dan had needed to go the store and pay $14 for that tiny can of formula, which seemed to last forever when Sam was so small, he would have thought twice about using it when there was pumped milk in the fridge. It kept Sam asleep longer during the night. (Dan disagrees with me on this point. He thinks he would have been fine with the formula either way because Sam needed to eat, period. Which is true. But it put us on a bad course that neither of us really understood.)
By the time Sam was two months old, he was 100% bottle fed with pumped human milk from me during the day and a bottle or two of formula from Dan at night. Pumping all the time was a great way to measure things, but it was killing me. Sam was gaining weight well (funny how drinking something intended to turn a 50-100lb baby animal into an animal that weighs a literal ton as an adult will do that) so...I took a risk and tried to get him back on the breast. It worked, sort of. Sam was always a contentious nurser. I struggled so hard with anxiety over whether he would willingly breastfeed that he was always annoyed with me, unless it was the first feeding of the morning, when we were both sleepy and I had a ton of milk (from not feeding him all night). Most other feedings I had to hold and rock him in a specific chair or lie down in bed, and sing to him to keep his focus. As the months went by, he breastfed less and less and started on formula bottles earlier and earlier during the day, until we only had one feeding at the breast in the morning. About a month after we'd introduced solids, I decided that maybe it was time to give up so I could change my depression meds. Pretty much the next day Sam got a nasty cold and actually wanted and needed to breastfeed. We lingered along doing that one or two feeding a day thing until about 10 months when I called it quits. Funny thing--a day or two after weaning is the only time I ever experienced any engorgement at all. So you can see why I doubted my supply somewhat.
All told, we probably bought well over $1000 worth of formula over time, starting with Enfamil and then moving to the generic brand from Target. We also bought a ton of Gerber baby food (also Nestlé.) That $50 "gift certificate" and $32 of "free" formula was a good investment over time, don't you think? There were also the $5 off "checks" that they'd send in the mail for their $30 cans of formula.
That's right. The salesgirl at Motherhood had been paid some sort of commission to get the names and addresses of pregnant women who planned to breastfeed. Here's the thing. Formula companies don't send free samples to women who plan to formula feed. They don't need to. They're already going to get that person's business. They send free samples to women who plan to breastfeed, knowing that that first week can be hell, and women or their partners will cave. The other thing is that that $30 can of formula costs maybe $5 to produce, package, and deliver. It's not worth $30. It's not even worth the $19.99 that Target charges for the generic. It's purely based on corporate greed and the amount of money those companies spend marketing the stuff, which in the end, hurts the families who need the formula more than anyone. They charge that much because they can. Because once you've decided to stop breastfeeding and switch to formula, it is practically an impossible decision to reverse. They've got you. And they've been controlling the conversation about infant feeding for over a century.
Sam had a sign on his bassinet saying that he was to be exclusively breastfed. He was born early because of my pre-ecclampsia. Newborns have undeveloped digestive tracts without the beneficial flora needed to digest foods other than breastmilk. It is no coincidence that preemies fed formula are at a high risk of necrotizing enterocolitis. Sam wasn't technically premature but I would have appreciated a chance at keeping his "virgin gut" a bit longer. Apparently the nurse wasn't aware of these risks, and neither was I, so I let her give him formula even though I would have preferred donor milk. There is no milk bank in Minnesota which is a tragedy.
While the conversation has been changed from "Formula=Science! Which is better than breastmilk, which eww, that's gross, what are you, a cow? And won't your husband be sad he has to share your boobs? And besides, that's what those dirty immigrants do," to "Formula=almost as good as breastmilk, and really, breastfeeding is for crunchy-granola hippies who have nothing better to do than have a kid on their boob all day," or "Breastfeeding is nice, but formula feeding is normal," that's frankly not much improvement and it's not the truth. But it's still what formula companies are putting out there. You know where they get the DHA and ARA they tout as "important pre-biotics (a made-up word) like those found in breastmilk"? Fish oil and GMO seaweed. And there is no evidence that babies can even absorb them in those forms.
Now, lest this become a diatribe against formula feeding mothers, I assure you it is not. After all, I am/was one. I am also aware that combinations of lack of family support, needing to return to work, needing to take certain medications, having had breast surgery of any kind, etc. can interfere with breastfeeding. And it doesn't have to be all or nothing. It is also not about guilt--all parents do the best we can with the information we have at the time.
I just wish that formula companies would comply with the rules intended to protect babies from unnecessary early weaning. I started out wanting and expecting to breastfeed well over a year, potentially at least two years if I could. The first week Sam was born I figured I'd be lucky to make it to six months. When I was exclusively pumping, it became three months. Fortunately I was able to continue to nurse Sam at least part of the time past those last two goals, but I am still angry that I didn't meet my own personal goal from before Sam was born. Maybe it wasn't meant to be--maybe Sam's sensory issues were the real culprit--but I'll never know for sure. It wasn't just Nestlé, but the whole system of booby-traps that sabotaged our breastfeeding relationship. However I can't keep throwing money at a company who is willing to throw babies under the bus for a profit. I just can't.
And it's hard. Nestlé is into everything. There's the obvious: Crunch bars, Butterfingers, Drumsticks. Wonka and Cadbury. Then there's Lean Cuisine and Stouffer's, Edy's and Häagen-Dazs. A lot of dairy-like products like Coffeemate and Nescafe, and Nesquik. All Gerber food products. Tons of bottled waters, though I try not to buy those as much these days so I can't remember which. Luckily we don't have any pets because they are all over the pet food industry--Purina and several others. And they still own a 30% share in L'Oreal so none of that plus Maybelline, Garnier, and several others. Almost all of these were products I bought regularly. My coupon habit has become more difficult since Nestlé does so much marketing--at least a 3rd of the coupons I get are for Nestlé products. We love Drumsticks, and I miss them. Lean Cuisine makes frozen pizzas and sandwiches that Dan liked to take to work. I'm getting bored of International Delight. But that's part of what makes it important. It's not an easy boycott like the Chik Fil A thing would have been. It's stuff that we used to use, a lot, and now we don't.
So if you ever see me checking labels, or saying that I'm not interested that Lean Cuisines are on sale at Target, that's why. Next baby, whenever that is, I'll be armed with information and support. You may notice that many of the resources and articles I've linked to here were from 2011. Too late to help Sam, but not too late for his potential little brother or sister. And I'll buy my maternity clothes online or use the ones I already have.
There are many good reasons to boycott Nestlé, from their predatory marketing in 3rd world countries, to their misleading "breastfeeding support" hotlines and websites, to their 30+ years of violation of the WHO code for marketing breastmilk substitutes. What finally pushed me over the edge, though, was my own experience. Selfish, I know.
Midwinter in early 2010 or late 2009, I needed to buy some maternity clothes. Since there aren't a lot of stores that carry plus sized maternity clothing, I went to one where I knew I could find a few decent, if overpriced, maternity jeans, sweaters, and t-shirts. My mom went with me to Motherhood Maternity in Southdale. She bought a couple things for me as birthday presents and I bought the rest. At the checkout counter I gave my usual "no, I don't give out my personal information" when the clerk asked if I wanted to sign up for their marketing list. But this lady was pushy. They were offering a discount on the clothes (I think? It's hard to remember back that far) and a $50 "gift card" for restaurants.com. Naiive young pregnant woman that I was, I believed that it was worth the $50 to give her my address. Anyone who's used restaurants.com knows that it's not a gift card, it's a coupon. $50 off a purchase of $100 or more, or you could instead buy $25 off a purchase of $35 or more, which is what I did to get a slightly better deal. I was annoyed, but it wasn't like I was out any extra money, yet.
(Side note: the website has a limited selection of restaurants where the coupon can be redeemed, none of which were in our neighborhood aside from the s****y "Mexican" bar across the highway. They specialize in the cuisine of "southern Colorado", and everyone who works there is white and bitchy. They had a sign that said "We Say Merry Christmas" that year, a thinly veiled "Jews and Muslims Not Welcome" sign. We lived in a neighborhood with a lot of Muslim immigrants, who were in general good neighbors, so I was annoyed. Not like they would have eaten there, since, you know, pork, but the sign was visible from the highway and the idea of making my good neighbors feel unwelcome was really upsetting to me. We didn't go back, and lost that extra $25 worth of coupon. Ugh.)
About a month before Sam was born, I received in the mail two small cans of Enfamil. I was livid. At the time I had no idea who had sent them or why. Was it thebump.com? My doctor or the hospital where I'd preregistered? The retailers where I'd registered for baby gifts? I had no idea but I was pissed. I'd always known I'd want to have kids and breastfeed those kids. It is the main reason why I put up with decades of back pain rather than get a breast reduction and risk my chances of being able to breastfeed. The idea that anyone would think I would want this stuff in my house (and I already knew that just having it available was risking my success at breastfeeding) made me angry. Not because I hate formula. Because I hate the pusher aspect of the companies who sell it. Here's a free sample, just enough to get you hooked on a highly processed food that will be your baby's sole nutrition for 6 months. No way. I'd planned to give both cans to a friend who happened to have stopped breastfeeding and was giving her daughter formula at the time, but then I went on bedrest. And didn't see her again until the hospital, and by the time I was able to actually give her the formula it was far too late.
Sam latched pretty well in the hospital. There were a couple hiccups here and there--a psycho nurse who insisted on pumping his stomach and giving him a small amount of formula through a tube, because of "low blood sugar". Yes, he was a little lethargic. He was barely a day old and it was the middle of the night. I probably should have asked to pump, or just put him straight on the boob after the mucous came out of his tummy, but I was tired. I hurt everywhere. Ladies, this is why you need labor and post-partum doulas who know your choices and can stand up for you. Your partner is not going to do it unless you've gotten him to do his own research and get enthusiastically on board (and well versed) with the plan, which didn't happen in my case.
Both of us were reasonably uneducated about breastfeeding a newborn, and honestly I think that first "he's got low blood sugar, it's not working" killed my confidence. In the next few days, rather than nursing on demand 24 hours per day, I let Dan take him for a few hours each night so I could rest. Again, everything hurt--especially my right wrist, where they finally got the IV to go in for my pitocin. The hep lock was poorly managed after Sam was born, and I'm not exactly sure what happened, but it hurt all the time for a couple of months, making it super-difficult for me to hold Sam to my breast. So. We slept in shifts. Bad, bad idea. Sam needed to be on the boob more or less at all times and I was so frustrated with the whole thing because he was always crying. I thought it wasn't working. I couldn't understand why my baby was so angry all the time. (As it turns out, crying is a very, very late hunger cue. Any time a newborn is awake, he or she should be eating.) We were writing down everything, timing everything, and he wasn't having quite enough wet diapers by day 4. I broke down. Dan's (very pregnant at the time) sister took him to the store to buy a double electric pump and her husband watched Sam while I lay down and cried for a bit.
At 5 days old, Sam weighed almost two pounds less than his birth weight. He was dehydrated. I nursed him at the doctors office and he gained an ounce. That day we were sent here, there, and everywhere, to try to get someone to help us get the breastfeeding thing working. It was exhausting and by the end of the day, I had learned some useful things about getting Sam to latch but had not gained any confidence, and was still encouraged to record *&^$ing everything. Because there would be a test. So it seemed. At that point I was more afraid of having my baby taken away from me for not feeding him "right" than anything else. Irrational post-partum-brain nonsense? Sure. Did anyone attempt to replace those assumptions with anything else? Nope. And the $300 bill for the hospital lactation consultant took for freaking ever for the insurance to pay. Obviously I didn't go back, even though I probably needed to and it was technically covered. (LLL was unreachable when we tried that morning. I was sent to a WIC peer counselor and then a LC at United/Children's.)
Sam had his first bottle of formula that night. I strongly suspect that if Dan had needed to go the store and pay $14 for that tiny can of formula, which seemed to last forever when Sam was so small, he would have thought twice about using it when there was pumped milk in the fridge. It kept Sam asleep longer during the night. (Dan disagrees with me on this point. He thinks he would have been fine with the formula either way because Sam needed to eat, period. Which is true. But it put us on a bad course that neither of us really understood.)
By the time Sam was two months old, he was 100% bottle fed with pumped human milk from me during the day and a bottle or two of formula from Dan at night. Pumping all the time was a great way to measure things, but it was killing me. Sam was gaining weight well (funny how drinking something intended to turn a 50-100lb baby animal into an animal that weighs a literal ton as an adult will do that) so...I took a risk and tried to get him back on the breast. It worked, sort of. Sam was always a contentious nurser. I struggled so hard with anxiety over whether he would willingly breastfeed that he was always annoyed with me, unless it was the first feeding of the morning, when we were both sleepy and I had a ton of milk (from not feeding him all night). Most other feedings I had to hold and rock him in a specific chair or lie down in bed, and sing to him to keep his focus. As the months went by, he breastfed less and less and started on formula bottles earlier and earlier during the day, until we only had one feeding at the breast in the morning. About a month after we'd introduced solids, I decided that maybe it was time to give up so I could change my depression meds. Pretty much the next day Sam got a nasty cold and actually wanted and needed to breastfeed. We lingered along doing that one or two feeding a day thing until about 10 months when I called it quits. Funny thing--a day or two after weaning is the only time I ever experienced any engorgement at all. So you can see why I doubted my supply somewhat.
All told, we probably bought well over $1000 worth of formula over time, starting with Enfamil and then moving to the generic brand from Target. We also bought a ton of Gerber baby food (also Nestlé.) That $50 "gift certificate" and $32 of "free" formula was a good investment over time, don't you think? There were also the $5 off "checks" that they'd send in the mail for their $30 cans of formula.
That's right. The salesgirl at Motherhood had been paid some sort of commission to get the names and addresses of pregnant women who planned to breastfeed. Here's the thing. Formula companies don't send free samples to women who plan to formula feed. They don't need to. They're already going to get that person's business. They send free samples to women who plan to breastfeed, knowing that that first week can be hell, and women or their partners will cave. The other thing is that that $30 can of formula costs maybe $5 to produce, package, and deliver. It's not worth $30. It's not even worth the $19.99 that Target charges for the generic. It's purely based on corporate greed and the amount of money those companies spend marketing the stuff, which in the end, hurts the families who need the formula more than anyone. They charge that much because they can. Because once you've decided to stop breastfeeding and switch to formula, it is practically an impossible decision to reverse. They've got you. And they've been controlling the conversation about infant feeding for over a century.
Sam had a sign on his bassinet saying that he was to be exclusively breastfed. He was born early because of my pre-ecclampsia. Newborns have undeveloped digestive tracts without the beneficial flora needed to digest foods other than breastmilk. It is no coincidence that preemies fed formula are at a high risk of necrotizing enterocolitis. Sam wasn't technically premature but I would have appreciated a chance at keeping his "virgin gut" a bit longer. Apparently the nurse wasn't aware of these risks, and neither was I, so I let her give him formula even though I would have preferred donor milk. There is no milk bank in Minnesota which is a tragedy.
While the conversation has been changed from "Formula=Science! Which is better than breastmilk, which eww, that's gross, what are you, a cow? And won't your husband be sad he has to share your boobs? And besides, that's what those dirty immigrants do," to "Formula=almost as good as breastmilk, and really, breastfeeding is for crunchy-granola hippies who have nothing better to do than have a kid on their boob all day," or "Breastfeeding is nice, but formula feeding is normal," that's frankly not much improvement and it's not the truth. But it's still what formula companies are putting out there. You know where they get the DHA and ARA they tout as "important pre-biotics (a made-up word) like those found in breastmilk"? Fish oil and GMO seaweed. And there is no evidence that babies can even absorb them in those forms.
Now, lest this become a diatribe against formula feeding mothers, I assure you it is not. After all, I am/was one. I am also aware that combinations of lack of family support, needing to return to work, needing to take certain medications, having had breast surgery of any kind, etc. can interfere with breastfeeding. And it doesn't have to be all or nothing. It is also not about guilt--all parents do the best we can with the information we have at the time.
I just wish that formula companies would comply with the rules intended to protect babies from unnecessary early weaning. I started out wanting and expecting to breastfeed well over a year, potentially at least two years if I could. The first week Sam was born I figured I'd be lucky to make it to six months. When I was exclusively pumping, it became three months. Fortunately I was able to continue to nurse Sam at least part of the time past those last two goals, but I am still angry that I didn't meet my own personal goal from before Sam was born. Maybe it wasn't meant to be--maybe Sam's sensory issues were the real culprit--but I'll never know for sure. It wasn't just Nestlé, but the whole system of booby-traps that sabotaged our breastfeeding relationship. However I can't keep throwing money at a company who is willing to throw babies under the bus for a profit. I just can't.
And it's hard. Nestlé is into everything. There's the obvious: Crunch bars, Butterfingers, Drumsticks. Wonka and Cadbury. Then there's Lean Cuisine and Stouffer's, Edy's and Häagen-Dazs. A lot of dairy-like products like Coffeemate and Nescafe, and Nesquik. All Gerber food products. Tons of bottled waters, though I try not to buy those as much these days so I can't remember which. Luckily we don't have any pets because they are all over the pet food industry--Purina and several others. And they still own a 30% share in L'Oreal so none of that plus Maybelline, Garnier, and several others. Almost all of these were products I bought regularly. My coupon habit has become more difficult since Nestlé does so much marketing--at least a 3rd of the coupons I get are for Nestlé products. We love Drumsticks, and I miss them. Lean Cuisine makes frozen pizzas and sandwiches that Dan liked to take to work. I'm getting bored of International Delight. But that's part of what makes it important. It's not an easy boycott like the Chik Fil A thing would have been. It's stuff that we used to use, a lot, and now we don't.
So if you ever see me checking labels, or saying that I'm not interested that Lean Cuisines are on sale at Target, that's why. Next baby, whenever that is, I'll be armed with information and support. You may notice that many of the resources and articles I've linked to here were from 2011. Too late to help Sam, but not too late for his potential little brother or sister. And I'll buy my maternity clothes online or use the ones I already have.
Monday, March 25, 2013
I kind of hate March
March is pretty much my worst month, depression wise. I am sad and annoyed with myself that I left my blog sit for two weeks, but there wasn't much I could do about it. I was just empty.
Yes, the days seem longer, but it was still cold and snowy. And we were sick. It started with a stomach bug that Thursday after Charter screwed up our internet. I wasn't 100% until the next Monday or Tuesday. At that point Maggie was coming down with a cold, which hit us full force by the following weekend. And we were sick with that pretty much all of last week. As of Saturday night, I was feeling better but still coughing up goop.
Aside from the sickness, I just felt blank. Yes, I was having "the feels", but I just couldn't put any of it down in words. What I really wanted, practically every second of every day, was to go back to bed. I knew that was the depression talking, though, so I just stuck it out. I think part of it is that at this point I've been patiently waiting for spring for so long that it feels like it will never come. A March day in November would probably feel delightful. At this point though, I'm just so worn down that I can hardly stand the cold and snow anymore.
On Friday, I read a post on The Feminist Breeder about how she likes to organize when she's stressed. I am sort of the opposite. I tend to let things pile up until it's unbearable. However, I almost always feel much better when the piles are finally dealt with. Now, I'm going to trust all of you here when I share what I posted in response to one of the other readers who said that her clutter will build up sometimes as well. And the before and after pictures.
"I so hear that! Mess is one of my symptoms and also triggers for depression. Definitely a downward spiral. Usually it takes the husband getting fed up with it and going on a rampage for things to get straightened out. Rather than looking at everything like Tetris, I just sort of get overwhelmed and shut down. It sucks. It gets worse when I have a cold or don't feel well, too (like right now). You wouldn't want to see my kitchen counter at the moment...just the one surface looks like a hoarder's house. Piles. ><
But now I'm feeling inspired to clean it off. Maybe I'll take a before and after and post a link to the pictures. :)"
Pre-Sam, (well, pre-Sam's climbing days) I used to reward myself for tidying up the kitchen by lighting a scented candle I'd place on a plate on the stovetop. Unfortunately his idea of a good time these days is to push a large dining area chair or a counter stool into the kitchen, climb up, and open and close the microwave. It is terrifying. One of the few times we've spanked him has been for climbing like this. I really, really don't like or plan to do it...I don't think it helps communicate anything other than "Mommy is very angry". But he scares the crap out of me sometimes. So no lit candles in my house at the moment. You might also notice that the block of knives that used to be back in the corner to the right of the stove is now gone. I had other things piled in front of it, but now that Sam climbs it needs to be locked away. For the time being, it's on its side on the bottom shelf of the cabinet to the right of the microwave, and that cabinet will have a Sam-proof latch very soon.
Anyhow, the fridge still needs to be cleaned inside and out, and I need to go through the pantry and purge and reorganize. But my cabinets and drawers are mostly in good shape.
And I feel a bit better. And it's almost April.
Yes, the days seem longer, but it was still cold and snowy. And we were sick. It started with a stomach bug that Thursday after Charter screwed up our internet. I wasn't 100% until the next Monday or Tuesday. At that point Maggie was coming down with a cold, which hit us full force by the following weekend. And we were sick with that pretty much all of last week. As of Saturday night, I was feeling better but still coughing up goop.
Aside from the sickness, I just felt blank. Yes, I was having "the feels", but I just couldn't put any of it down in words. What I really wanted, practically every second of every day, was to go back to bed. I knew that was the depression talking, though, so I just stuck it out. I think part of it is that at this point I've been patiently waiting for spring for so long that it feels like it will never come. A March day in November would probably feel delightful. At this point though, I'm just so worn down that I can hardly stand the cold and snow anymore.
On Friday, I read a post on The Feminist Breeder about how she likes to organize when she's stressed. I am sort of the opposite. I tend to let things pile up until it's unbearable. However, I almost always feel much better when the piles are finally dealt with. Now, I'm going to trust all of you here when I share what I posted in response to one of the other readers who said that her clutter will build up sometimes as well. And the before and after pictures.
"I so hear that! Mess is one of my symptoms and also triggers for depression. Definitely a downward spiral. Usually it takes the husband getting fed up with it and going on a rampage for things to get straightened out. Rather than looking at everything like Tetris, I just sort of get overwhelmed and shut down. It sucks. It gets worse when I have a cold or don't feel well, too (like right now). You wouldn't want to see my kitchen counter at the moment...just the one surface looks like a hoarder's house. Piles. ><
But now I'm feeling inspired to clean it off. Maybe I'll take a before and after and post a link to the pictures. :)"
Just put me on TV. I'm a bad person.
OK. Majority of the garbage, dirty dishes, and food dealt with. At this point I needed a short break.
Second wind and I made a good sized dent made in the clutter. We can see the surface of the counter peninsula! Hooray! (Note: I did not align the fridge magnets. That was someone else. ;) )
And Saturday. Big piles of paper under control (sort of; I still had a big stack of "paper I don't know what to do with" on the kitchen table.) Neat line of things that belong in other rooms at the end of the counter. Appliances conquered; bread dough rising on the stove. Top of the fridge still needs help, but that will have to wait.
Pre-Sam, (well, pre-Sam's climbing days) I used to reward myself for tidying up the kitchen by lighting a scented candle I'd place on a plate on the stovetop. Unfortunately his idea of a good time these days is to push a large dining area chair or a counter stool into the kitchen, climb up, and open and close the microwave. It is terrifying. One of the few times we've spanked him has been for climbing like this. I really, really don't like or plan to do it...I don't think it helps communicate anything other than "Mommy is very angry". But he scares the crap out of me sometimes. So no lit candles in my house at the moment. You might also notice that the block of knives that used to be back in the corner to the right of the stove is now gone. I had other things piled in front of it, but now that Sam climbs it needs to be locked away. For the time being, it's on its side on the bottom shelf of the cabinet to the right of the microwave, and that cabinet will have a Sam-proof latch very soon.
Anyhow, the fridge still needs to be cleaned inside and out, and I need to go through the pantry and purge and reorganize. But my cabinets and drawers are mostly in good shape.
And I feel a bit better. And it's almost April.
Friday, March 8, 2013
Video Friday: "Girl Rising" Official Trailer
It's International Women's Day. The video sort of speaks for itself.
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Thanks, Charter!
So this is a cop-out post because my internet at home is borked. Dan did some troubleshooting last night and it looks like our whole neighborhood is down. So I am typing on my phone with my thumb. Not ideal. I don't have a great data plan so I'm just not going to tether my phone or make it a hotspot. See you Friday.
Monday, March 4, 2013
Blanket #1 for project Linus, finished!
And here it is, finally. This is the most time-consuming one I'll make all year. Stripes next time. Stripes.
Now I just need to wash it and deliver it to Project Linus. Whew.
Fully assembled, but needed to weave in ends and do border (Sunday).
And fully finished with simple border in black (today).
Now I just need to wash it and deliver it to Project Linus. Whew.
Friday, March 1, 2013
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